Let's Join Together And Grotesquely Distort Judaism

All great religions deserve the chance to be grotesquely distorted. After all, what's more beautiful than taking the purest expressions of mankind's best instincts, and twisting them into excuses for hatred and bloodshed? Nothing! What's better than using a religion as an obscene justification for the violation of the religion's most basic tenets? Nothing is better!

Christianity and Islam have had the advantage over Judaism in this area for a thousand years, because they had states claiming to be based on them. Thus, when Jerry Falwell writes that "God is Pro-War," he's drawing on a deep, proud, grotesque tradition. Likewise when Osama bin Laden learnedly explains why it's A-OK with Allah to murder 3,000 people.

So Judaism really has some ground to make up here. Fortunately, the Israeli army is giving it its best shot, most recently by naming an attack on Gaza "Days of Penitence."

The Days of Penitence, of course, are the ten days starting with Rosh Hashanah and ending with Yom Kippur. During them, you're supposed to think about your sins, seek out those you've wronged, and ask forgiveness.

So -- it's pretty funny to name a military operation after them. What a great joke on the Palestinians! And what a great joke on anyone who thought the Days of Penitence could signify something other than dealing out death! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Too bad Albert Einstein isn't alive to see it. He'd think it was pretty funny too. Right?

"...my awareness of the essential nature of Judaism resists the idea of a Jewish state with borders, an army, and a measure of temporal power no matter how modest. I am afraid of the inner damage Judaism will sustain -- especially from the development of a narrow nationalism within our own ranks, against which we have already had to fight strongly, even without a Jewish state. We are no longer the Jews of the Maccabee period. A return to a nation in the political sense of the word would be equivalent to turning away from the spiritualization of our community which we owe to the genius of our prophets."

I bet what Einstein would enjoy most of all is that now, when you search Google for the phrase "Days of Penitence," the top six results are about the IDF killing people. Only when you get to number seven do they start having anything to do with Judaism.

UPDATE: Rafael Esterson points out: "The Hebrew "Yemei Teshuvah' can be translated as 'Days of penitence', but also as 'Days of responding' - which is the pun at work here."

He adds: "Does this make the action any less deplorable? No. Is it important to get these cultural nuances? I think so." I agree on both counts.