or Powell's or me• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show
•
"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket
•
"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming
October 02, 2006
Dick Cheney Tells America To Go Fuck Itself
Bob Woodward was good enough to include a passage in his new book illustrating exactly why government officials do what they do. It comes as Woodward describes attempts by Andrew Card, Bush's chief of staff, to ease Rumsfeld out:
Card kept pushing, at one point raising the possibility of change at the Pentagon with Vice President Cheney.No, Cheney said, he was predisposed to recommend that the president keep Rumsfeld right where he was. Card was not surprised.
In private conversations with Bush, Cheney said Rumsfeld's departure, no matter how it might be spun, would be seen only as an expression of doubt and hesitation on the war. It would give the war critics great heart and momentum, he confided to an aide, and soon they would be after him and then the president. He virtually insisted that Rumsfeld stay.
What's the significance of this? Look at Cheney's reasoning.
Did he say: We've got to keep Don there, because we need his expertise to win the war?
Did he say: We've got to keep Don there, because that's what's best for America?
No No No No, and also No.
Cheney's decision had nothing to do with what he thought was best for the country. It was solely about what was good for him and Bush.*
Kissinger famously said that Israel had no foreign policy, only domestic politicsâ€â€Âmeaning that what Israel did externally had basically nothing to do with the real needs of the country. Instead, Israel's actions abroad were an outgrowth of struggles for political supremacy between different factions within Israel.
Of course, Kissinger shouldn't have been so smug, because every country's like that. Still, it's bracing to see how stark it is in the Bush administration: whatever Cheney and Bush have to do for self-preservation, they'll do, no matter how much it screws the rest of America.
* If you spoke to Cheney about this, he'd tell you that he WAS thinking about the good of Americaâ€â€Âbecause America desperately needs his leadership in these dark days, so anything he does to stay in power is by definition good for America. Of course, Saddam Hussein would have told you the same thing about himself and Iraq.
** And that was pretty much word-for-word what Stalin's top assassin said to excuse himself.
Posted by: James Cape at October 2, 2006 12:34 PMThis is why I get pretty shook when I think about 2008. Are they really going to do all this crazy shit to obtain and consolidate their power just to give it up because the Constitution says they have to? We know what they think about the Constitution...
Posted by: at October 2, 2006 01:58 PMThe doves and quails of America have formed a feathered alliance allegedly known as the Kamikaze Kovey Kommandos with the single goal of pecking Cheney to an unpleasant demise the next time he ventures forth with his trusty shotgun. Word is that they are studying the various avian attack techniques made famous in "The Birds," and that legions of left wing, right wing and uncommitted lawyers have already offered their services pro bono.
Posted by: Jesus B. Ochoa at October 2, 2006 02:25 PMMan, you gotta lay off Cheney. Dude's under a lot of pressure!
Posted by: Guest at October 2, 2006 03:12 PM"L'etat c'est moi."
Posted by: Jonathan Versen at October 2, 2006 05:55 PMThere is an instant cure for this...it's called the Guillotine. Get it out, boys, the world will cheer you on.
Posted by: En Ming Hee at October 2, 2006 11:31 PMPolly wants a cracker and all leaders are alike.
NEW YORK -- Although Al Qaeda-linked groups recently executed two kidnapped civilian workers, the United States continues to maintain it will not negotiate with terrorists, whatever the price -- even if violence against Americans and their allies gets worse.
"I think there's a likelihood attacks could escalate in Iraq and Saudi Arabia] and that's certainly the philosophy behind refusing to negotiate with terrorists," said Robert Jordan, a former U.S. ambassador to Saudi Arabia. "I think it's a sound philosophy one that's proved the test of time that should be continued."
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,123439,00.html
Terror must be stopped. No nation can negotiate with terrorists. For there is no way to make peace with those whose only goal is death.
--George Bush
http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2002/04/20020404-1.html
Putin says Russia not to negotiate with terrorists, rebels
http://english.people.com.cn/200409/01/eng20040901_155591.html
Prime Minister Ehud Olmert's office publicly rejected any possibility of agreeing to a prisoner-exchange deal, stating Israel does not negotiate with terrorists.
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=50894
National reconciliation is a necessary and an urgent priority ... but America will never negotiate with terrorists or support their entry into Afghanistan's government.
--Bill Frist
http://www.volpac.org/index.cfm?FuseAction=Blogs.View&Blog_id=483&Month=10&Year=2006
Vice President Cheney: Don't Deal with Terrorists, Destroy Them
http://www.newsmax.com/archives/articles/2006/1/20/92950.shtml
Posted by: rob payne at October 3, 2006 12:58 AMJonathan: You're exactly right. And when they say "national security" they mean "keeping the administration in office". Otherwise people like Sibel Edmonds would not be viewed as a threat to national security. Instead, the interests of national security would dictate the necessity for a full investigation of 9/11, without the gag orders.
Posted by: Winter Patriot at October 3, 2006 01:04 PM
