Thank gawd we have such an intelligent guy in charge. Otherwise we wouldn't learn anything. (snark)

It boggles the mind how we survived before this.

The way he said it may be a bit absurdist, but that's only the result of his clumsily covering up what he actually meant: "When we captured him, I told the Central Intelligence Agency, why don't we [torture him to] find out what he knows in order to be able to protect America from another attack." Which is actually significant. Only a maverick like our president could have conceived of such a bloody scheme.

Saurabh wrote:

"When we captured him, I told the Central Intelligence Agency, why don't we [torture him to] find out what he knows in order to be able to protect America from another attack."

I like this interpretation. However, the problem is that used these technics even in the 'old wars' --so what is so significant about the sentence "In this new kind of war" which indicates it is a new kind, not just another war! I think the administration's arrogance is once again the culprit here. They can help but think to themselves how great they are: WE came up with a "new kind of war" and a "novel solution", which brings us back to the Nazis...

Jon, your fictitious dialog must be music to Bush's ears!!! I am sure he is contemplating as to whether to ask you to be his next speech writer:)

Whoever invented Bush's schtick is a genius. It's amazing how much mileage he's gotten out of pretending to be dumber than he really is in order to conceal how evil he really is. And we just keep eating it up, cause everybody's waiting for somebody else to figure out what to do, and nobody can believe that somebody who acts like an alcoholic, petty-larcenist, lowest-ten-percent, bullshit-artist pharmaceuticals rep from Galveston is actually up there representing the most powerful nation on earth. People with half a brain are dumbfounded by the irony.

This reminds me of a conversation I had years ago with some fellow workers at a summer job, who seemed to think that we needed the death penalty because too many criminals were getting released early from prison. Two different issues entirely (since the alternative to the death penalty is life in prison, not early release), but close enough to confuse people.

Similarly, Bush et al hope that you think if the government is not waterboarding someone, it will turn them loose to join Willie Horton on a killing spree in your neighborhood. That is, given a choice between two stupid alternatives, you'll ignore the effective one actually advocated by liberals.

You mean in the "new war" the Sergeant Schultz defense no longer works? "I KNOW NOZZZINK!"

Sort of sums up humanity's general sense of things.

Are you moonlighting for ABC?

I think that is a fairly good statement coming from someone who graduated from Yale with half of his brain still intact. But I think all in all that it is a toss up between Bush and Kerry, who just committed political suicide, not that I care, as to who is dumber, they both seem to be dumber than dirt.

Not only that, but no snacks or naptime until they answer the questions. We might even make them listen to Poison and Night Ranger for several hours.

Just when you think it can't get any more stupid, someone writes in requesting that everybody sing-along to an updated version of the old Spike Jones classic my mommy and daddy used to sing to me when I was mere tyke:

"Vehn der Fuhrer says 'Vee ist der master race' vee Heil, PTTTT! Heil, PTTTT! Right in der Fuhrer's face. Not to luff der Fuhrer iss a great disgrace so vee Heil, PTTTT! Heil, PTTTT! Right in Herr Bush's face!"

Kerry just exposed a much blacker side of his political personality today by standing by his old Bonesman buddy with that embarrassing apology! Too bad nobody in either party has the courage to stand up and 'PTTTT!' right in our Fuhrer's face!

is this an ad for Guinness?

i sure feel like i could go for one right about now

In this new kind of war, we must be willing to question the enemy when we pick them up on the battlefield. (Applause.)

English language is gone. We all should ignore the abracadabra and start hable español. Now, while some of us (hopefully) are still sane.

"...and while yew got his head under water, why don't you get that ignerint towel-head to confess that he's a witch, tew? I betcha he is, dang it."

Rove's eyes light up when Bush says, "...pick them up on the battlefield."

Like the "Active Duty" guys? Rove thinks...

All those muslim men wear dresses, I bet they are pansies. Jest like the Scotch.

Scotch is a drink.

Scotch is not a pansie drink and neither are the men like myself who wear a kilt