• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show
•
"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket
•
"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming
March 30, 2007
The Evasion Of Peace Process
With the current revival of the 2002 Arab League plan for peace with Israel, the U.S. and Israeli governments face a difficult challenge: how can they continue pretending they want peace, while avoiding it at all costs?
I assume the Bush administration will do its best simply to ignore the plan's existence. In this, they'll receive crucial help from media—for instance, the Washington Post, which helpfully put its story about the plan on page A14.
Things are harder for Olmert, because Israel is less powerful than the U.S., and thus sometimes has to acknowledge reality. Their scheme will likely be to talk fulsomely about how the plan is "welcome," and then hope everyone forgets about it. Olmert is already heading down this path, speaking about a "revolutionary change in outlook" by the Arab states (for which he takes credit), which could possibly lead to peace "in the next five years." But of course, it's impossible to be more specific, since—as an Israeli spokeswoman says—"we need to really sit down and study it." Less unsaid is how exactly something five years old could be revolutionary, and why it couldn't have been studied at some point during those five years.
In any case, this has worked well for both countries in the past, as with the 2002 version of this plan (which sank without a trace), and the 2003 Arab proposal for a WMD-free mideast (for which John Negreponte explained the timing was not right). Oh, how the U.S. and Israel yearn for peace! Oh, how they wish there could be a WMD-free mideast! They will surely move heaven and earth to make this happen, just as soon as the time is right! Which is the year 3478 A.D.
Posted at March 30, 2007 11:48 AM | TrackBackwell, i haven't had a chance to read the post myself, but, whether we're talking about a year, or 1,471 years, that's a timeline, an arbitrary date, and i can't emphasize enough how dangerous that would be for the great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandchildren of our troops.
Posted by: hibiscus at March 30, 2007 01:22 PMGeorge will be (hopefully) gone in 2 years, good time for another 5 year plan.
Posted by: Mike Meyer at March 30, 2007 01:24 PMWhen I saw "revolutionary change in outlook" in the news I couldn't believe my eyes. Well, actually that's not true: I could, unfortunately.
Things are harder for Olmert also because Israelis are smarter than Americans.
How do I know that?
Because Bush's approval rating stands at 33% while Olmert's is at 0.0000001% which, if you do the math, tells you that half of an Israeli thinks positively of Olmert. That would have to be half of himself. And even that half has its doubts.
By 3478 we will have a WMD-free Mideast because the WMDs would all have been used up by 2020 and turned the place into a wasteland where nothing can grow.
Posted by: En Ming Hee at March 31, 2007 11:24 AM