or Powell's or me• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show
•
"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket
•
"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming
January 16, 2009
Someone Get George A Waiver
George W. Bush, age 61, to U.S. soldiers in Afghanistan, March 12, 2008:
"I must say, I'm a little envious...If I were slightly younger and not employed here, I think it would be a fantastic experience to be on the front lines of helping this young democracy succeed...It must be exciting for you...in some ways romantic, in some ways, you know, confronting danger. You're really making history, and thanks."
George W. Bush, age 62, in farewell address, January 15, 2009:
"We see America’s character in Bill Krissoff, a surgeon from California. His son Nathan, a Marine, gave his life in Iraq. When I met Dr. Krissoff and his family, he delivered some surprising news: He told me he wanted to join the Navy Medical Corps in honor of his son. This good man was 60 years old - 18 years above the age limit. But his petition for a waiver was granted, and for the past year he has trained in battlefield medicine. Lieutenant Commander Krissoff could not be here tonight, because he will soon deploy to Iraq, where he will help save America’s wounded warriors and uphold the legacy of his fallen son."
—Jonathan Schwarz
Posted at January 16, 2009 08:05 AMWhen I read this monster's slimy rhetoric, so filled with debased language ("helping this young democracy to succeed"--aagh!) I actually want to throw my shoe at the monitor.
Posted by: Rosemary Molloy at January 16, 2009 08:26 AMMine clearing, as a work release program is an excellent idea.
Posted by: par4 at January 16, 2009 12:44 PMMine clearing, as a work release program is an excellent idea.
Posted by: par4 at January 16, 2009 12:46 PMMine clearing, as a work release program is an excellent idea.
Posted by: par4 at January 16, 2009 12:46 PMMine clearing, as a work release program is an excellent idea.
Posted by: par4 at January 16, 2009 12:46 PMSorry,Jon I think the tubes of the intranets are frozen.
Posted by: par4 at January 16, 2009 12:54 PMAhh, the sincerity of our national leaders who are always so eager to send the peons into the great meat grinder while they stay at home getting their palms greased by the “defense” industry. I’m sure G.I. George would just love to be on the front line but then he is too busy counting his money for that sort of thing. Besides our nation needs its greatest enemies in the government which is where they have always been.
Posted by: Rob Payne at January 16, 2009 07:48 PMJohn, you're still there? I thought that by now your head would have TOTALLY EXPLODED INTO A MILLION TINY PIECES. You need to stop remembering these things. It's bad for all of our healths.
Posted by: hedgehog at January 17, 2009 08:43 PM
