WE MUST AT ALL COST PREVENT A MUPPET-POKEMON ALLIANCE

Lots of uninformed people are making fun of Fox Business for this:

Eric Bolling of Follow the Money set the stage on Friday when he hosted a 7-minute segment that argued that The Muppets film – featuring bad-guy oilman Tex Richman -- promotes a left-wing agenda.

“We’re teaching our kids class warfare. Where are we, Communist China?” Bolling said...

“Is liberal Hollywood,” asks Bolling, “using class warfare to kind of brainwash our kids?”

What the fools denigrating Eric Bolling don't understand is that this kind of attack—the forces of darkness insidiously infiltrating our children's minds—has been documented many, many times. Fortunately, just as today, there have also always been stalwart heros who stand up to stop it:

...in 2001 the General Security Directorate provided Saddam a memorandum reporting that the cartoon character "Pokemon" really represented a subterfuge by international Zionism to undermine Iraq's security. Supposedly, "Pokemon" meant "I am Jewish" in Hebrew. They found the fact that the Pokemon character was "widely beloved" by Iraqi youth particularly alarming.

The only difference between Iraq in 2001 and America in 2011 is that our security services have not been wise enough (yet) to hire experts like Bolling to provide this kind of cogent threat analysis.

P.S. Let's not forget the monsters at Fisher-Price and what they did to the Little Mommy Real Loving Baby Cuddle and Coo doll.

—Jonathan Schwarz